Biblical Speech-Improvement Assignment

A Four-Week Biblical Counseling Assignment to Help You Establish New Habits in How You Talk

If you are going to influence a good relationship with a spouse, child, co-worker, etc, you are going to have to learn to put off speech that hinders, and put on speech that helps.  Communication is the life-blood of all relationships.  God gave us the ability to speak for the purpose of helping others, not hurting them. Even though there are times in many relationships we have to say tough things to each other, the Bible instructs us to say them graciously in the context of a demonstrated heart of love (Eph 4:15).  Prayerfully evaluate how you have been relating/communicating with this person in the light of the following truths.    Based each verse consider how you have or have not been obedient to God’s Word in your relating and communications. Choose a few of the verses that seem to relate with ways you need to improve most and begin memorizing those verses.  Discipline yourself to rehearse and write them out each morning.  List one circumstance in which you often are tempted to violate these speech-improving verses. Write briefly how and when the Holy Spirit would have you speak and respond differently to this person based on your verses.  End with prayers, praising and thanking God for His help in making you more like Christ. Humbly confess any failures and sins, particularly in communication with this person.  With this confession admit a lack of Christ-like love and humility as the cause for the failure.  (Make sure to keep current on seeking forgiveness with this person as well when you speak sinfully.)  End your time of prayer with sincere intercession for this person, asking God to meet their physical and spiritual needs in Christ. Consider using the prayers of the Apostle Paul as you pray for them (i.e. Eph 1:17ff; Eph 3:14ff; Col 1:9-14; 4-12).  As you are trying to change your speech habits, let the following perspective of Christ help motivate you to keep up the hard work of habit change in your speech:  “And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.’” (Matt 25:40 ESV)  Commit to doing this for at least four weeks. Begin each week by reviewing this entire list of verses to determine if you need to add new verses.

  • (Psa 141:3 NASB)  Set a guard, O LORD, over my mouth; Keep watch over the door of my lips.
  • (Prov 10:19 NASB) When there are many words, transgression is unavoidable, But he who restrains his lips is wise.
  • (Prov 10:20 NASB) The tongue of the righteous is as choice silver,The heart of the wicked is worth little.
  • (Prov 12:25 NASB)  Anxiety in the heart of a man weighs it down, But a good word makes it glad.
  • (Prov 15:1-2 NASB)  A gentle answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger. {2} The tongue of the wise makes knowledge acceptable, But the mouth of fools spouts folly.
  • Prov 15:4 (NASB) A soothing tongue is a tree of life, But perversion in it crushes the spirit.
  • (Prov 15:28 NASB)  The heart of the righteous ponders how to answer, But the mouth of the wicked pours out evil things.
  • (Prov 16:21 NASB) The wise in heart will be called understanding, And sweetness of speech increases persuasiveness.
  • (Prov 16:23-24 NASB)  The heart of the wise teaches his mouth, And adds persuasiveness to his lips. {24} Pleasant words are a honeycomb, Sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.
  • (Prov 17:14 NASB)  The beginning of strife is like letting out water, So abandon the quarrel before it breaks out.
  • (Prov 18:23 NASB)  The poor man utters supplications, But the rich man answers roughly.
  • (Prov 20:5 NASB)  A plan in the heart of a man is like deep water, But a man of understanding draws it out.
  • (Prov 20:15 NASB)  There is gold, and an abundance of jewels; But the lips of knowledge are a more precious thing.
  • (Prov 25:11-12 NASB)  Like apples of gold in settings of silver Is a word spoken in right circumstances. {12} Like an earring of gold and an ornament of fine gold Is a wise reprover to a listening ear.
  • (Prov 25:15 NASB)  By forbearance a ruler may be persuaded, And a soft tongue breaks the bone.
  • (Prov 29:11 NASB)  A fool always loses his temper, But a wise man holds it back.
  • (Prov 31:26 NASB)  She opens her mouth in wisdom, And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
  • (Eccl 12:10 NASB)  The Preacher sought to find delightful words and to write words of truth correctly.
  •  (Isa 50:4 NASB)  The Lord GOD has given Me the tongue of disciples, That I may know how to sustain the weary one with a word. He awakens Me morning by morning, He awakens My ear to listen as a disciple.
  • (Eph 4:15 NASB)  but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him, who is the head, even Christ,
  • (Eph 4:25-27 NASB)  Therefore, laying aside falsehood, SPEAK TRUTH, EACH ONE of you, WITH HIS NEIGHBOR, for we are members of one another. {26} BE ANGRY, AND yet DO NOT SIN; do not let the sun go down on your anger, {27} and do not give the devil an opportunity.
  • (Eph 4:29 NASB)  Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, that it may give grace to those who hear.
  • (Eph 4:32 NASB)  And be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.
  • (Prov 11:12-13 NASB)  He who despises his neighbor lacks sense, But a man of understanding keeps silent. {13} He who goes about as a talebearer reveals secrets, But he who is trustworthy conceals a matter.
  • (Prov 12:16 NASB)  A fool's vexation is known at once, But a prudent man conceals dishonor.
  • (Prov 12:18 NASB)  There is one who speaks rashly like the thrusts of a sword, But the tongue of the wise brings healing.
  • (Prov 16:27 NASB)  A worthless man digs up evil, While his words are as a scorching fire.
  • (Prov 17:9 NASB)  He who covers a transgression seeks love, But he who repeats a matter separates intimate friends.
  • (Prov 18:2 NASB)  A fool does not delight in understanding, But only in revealing his own mind.
  • (Prov 18:6 NASB)  A fool's lips bring strife, And his mouth calls for blows.
  • (Prov 18:8 NASB)  The words of a whisperer are like dainty morsels, And they go down into the innermost parts of the body.
  • (Prov 18:13 NASB)  He who gives an answer before he hears, It is folly and shame to him.
  • (Prov 18:17 NASB)  The first to plead his case seems just, Until another comes and examines him.
  • (Prov 19:1 NASB)  Better is a poor man who walks in his integrity Than he who is perverse in speech and is a fool.
  • (Prov 19:5 NASB)  A false witness will not go unpunished, And he who tells lies will not escape.
  • (Prov 20:19 NASB)  He who goes about as a slanderer reveals secrets, Therefore do not associate with a gossip.
  • (Prov 20:25 NASB)  It is a snare for a man to say rashly, "It is holy!" And after the vows to make inquiry. 
  • (Prov 26:18-22 NASB)  Like a madman who throws Firebrands, arrows and death, {19} So is the man who deceives his neighbor, And says, "Was I not joking?" {20} For lack of wood the fire goes out, And where there is no whisperer, contention quiets down. {21} Like charcoal to hot embers and wood to fire, So is a contentious man to kindle strife. {22} The words of a whisperer are like dainty morsels, And they go down into the innermost parts of the body.
  • (Prov 29:20 NASB)  Do you see a man who is hasty in his words? There is more hope for a fool than for him

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